Salamun 'alayk..
Aku tak tahu kenapa. Kalau aku berada dalam satu2 kelompok, mesti aku dianggap sebagai abang. Haha. Klakar kan. Sejak dari zaman sekolah lagi.
Nak kata macho, ayu je. Nak kata hensem, syantek je. Nak kata gagah, hm adela sikit. Tapi xkan sebab tu je?
Tak kesahlah kan. Asalkan orang keliling aku bahagia. Itu yg terbaik buat aku :)
Walau bagaimanapun, aku ada hutang dengan ahli beit aku. Aku sayang sangat kat diorang sampai aku pernah berharap xnak pindah dari umah tu sampai aku abes blaja. Aku anggap diorg tu sume as THE BEST housemates ever. Masalahnya, aku tak pandai nak tunjuk sayang. Itu hutang aku kat diorang.
Wuu..jiwa terseksa tau bila kite sayang kat org tu tapi x dapat nak luahkn or tunjukkan kat dia atas sebab TAK RETI. Cam loser je kan? Bnda senang pun xbleh buat. Ayam pun tau bagi sayang kat chicks dia.
Ni adela sket kata2 puitis yg aku karang utk korg. Aku tau x sedap.. huhu tapi korg terima jela eyh..ni antara cita2 yg aku nk buat tapi x tercapai..huhu..terimalah..~
Waktu kalian sedih..aku nak gak jadi bahu untuk menanggung perasaan..
Waktu kalian sakit..aku nak gak jadi doktor yg mngubati..
Waktu kalian takut..aku nak gak jadi sayap kiri yg menemani..
Waktu kalian marah..aku nak gak jadi kuli sekali-sekala..
Waktu kalian gelak ketawa..aku nak gak jadi pemeriah suasana..
Waktu kalian memerlukan..aku nak gak jadi tangan yg mhulur bantuan..
Waktu kalian peluk..aku nak gak membalas peluk balik..
Tapi aku TAK PANDAI buat sume tu..
Minta maaf sangat2..wuu~ aku sayang korg..awi2..
Uhibbukuna fillah..wallahi!!
<3<3<3<3<3<3 = 6 hearts for you anis, k.nad, k.dijah, dijah kecik, nadrah, n ila.
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Monday, 30 August 2010
i see you
salamu alayk..
I SEE YOU. Its not the dialogue in the Avatar movie. This time its real.
One day, a young lady F said to Sis K (her sister, in islam. )
Lady F: i'm afraid to come back to Malaysia this year.
Sis K: and may i know why?
Lady F: because..coming back to Malaysia; its like diving back into a damned dirty, smelly river.
Sis K: I dont quite understand what are you talkin about.
Lady F: U see, I was from that aweful, ugly, dark, full of shits n rubbishes river and it has a strong flow that could whack u away. Then i came here (to Egypt). Its like climbing up to the side of the river and I'm safe now. I could smell the fresh air that I never smelled before. My clothes are clean and tidy. My eyes are clear. And I could see the water I came from; how bad it was. For a while, I was in the comfort zone. But, after a deep thought last night, I think I can't return to that place. It's too horrible. It could drown me away for the second time!
Sis K: I got the point. Normally we wont return to a bad situation after we found a better place.
Lady F: Exactly!
Sis K: Well dear..in Egypt (or anywhere around the globe), we get the theories. But in Malaysia (or any place u came from), it's the practical we're talking about. So, if it is not u, then who will be cleaning up the mess? We can't call the African to do it; they have their own country to take care of. Yes you have to dive back into the river dear. Don't be scared. INNALLAHA MA'ANA..
Lady F: @_@''..insya Allah..
So here it goes. When i came back home, I see the thing she's fearing about. I see the people around me. The unmarried couples embracing each other. I see the ummah right in front of me. The people whose written in his/her identity card islam as his/her religion but they dont even pray and they always make their owm fatwa(s). Yes, this river is really contaminated! I had a culture shock right in my own ISLAMIC country.
Allah..Allah..Allah Almighty..please give me strength and inspiration on how to deal with this chronic and critical ummah of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w.. Please give me the chance to be one of your helpers..Allah You Are The Most Gracious amd Most Merciful. Ameen.
I SEE YOU. Its not the dialogue in the Avatar movie. This time its real.
One day, a young lady F said to Sis K (her sister, in islam. )
Lady F: i'm afraid to come back to Malaysia this year.
Sis K: and may i know why?
Lady F: because..coming back to Malaysia; its like diving back into a damned dirty, smelly river.
Sis K: I dont quite understand what are you talkin about.
Lady F: U see, I was from that aweful, ugly, dark, full of shits n rubbishes river and it has a strong flow that could whack u away. Then i came here (to Egypt). Its like climbing up to the side of the river and I'm safe now. I could smell the fresh air that I never smelled before. My clothes are clean and tidy. My eyes are clear. And I could see the water I came from; how bad it was. For a while, I was in the comfort zone. But, after a deep thought last night, I think I can't return to that place. It's too horrible. It could drown me away for the second time!
Sis K: I got the point. Normally we wont return to a bad situation after we found a better place.
Lady F: Exactly!
Sis K: Well dear..in Egypt (or anywhere around the globe), we get the theories. But in Malaysia (or any place u came from), it's the practical we're talking about. So, if it is not u, then who will be cleaning up the mess? We can't call the African to do it; they have their own country to take care of. Yes you have to dive back into the river dear. Don't be scared. INNALLAHA MA'ANA..
Lady F: @_@''..insya Allah..
So here it goes. When i came back home, I see the thing she's fearing about. I see the people around me. The unmarried couples embracing each other. I see the ummah right in front of me. The people whose written in his/her identity card islam as his/her religion but they dont even pray and they always make their owm fatwa(s). Yes, this river is really contaminated! I had a culture shock right in my own ISLAMIC country.
Allah..Allah..Allah Almighty..please give me strength and inspiration on how to deal with this chronic and critical ummah of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w.. Please give me the chance to be one of your helpers..Allah You Are The Most Gracious amd Most Merciful. Ameen.
Sunday, 1 August 2010
penyakit pelikku
Salamun alayk..
Lama aku tidak menulis. Sudah 3 bulan barangkali keyboard ini tidak digunakan untuk blogging. Aku malas. Tiada masa kononnya. Buat benda lagha berjam2 boleh pulak. Apa yg telah kau lakukan, Farah? Entah apa sebabnya, semangat untuk menulis kembali menyeru diri untuk menyampaikan ssuatu. Dalam bahasa melayu lagi. Maaflah kalau bunyi mcm pelik, sebab banyak sangat ckap arab (yeke?)
Terkenang waktu musim exam final aritu. Selalu muncul penyakit pelik2. Kali ini penyakit tak nak balik umah. Aku merantau ke rumah jiran yang semuanya ialah teman sekelas. Plus, my murobbi pun ada di situ, so mudahlah kalau nak minta dia ajarkan apa yang x faham. Hm, lama juga, lbih kurang 2 bulan lebih duduk sana. Balik umah sendiri sekali sekala. Itu pun untuk bayar duit sewa. Tanggungjawab sebagai ahli beit aku abaikan. Hak kepada ukhti toksah kira la. Lagila, x contact pun. Cakap benda yang penting sahaja. Padahal umah berjiran. Jalan 5min da sampai. Cess, sampai hati kau Farah?
Kenapa tak balik umah sekian lama? Kononnya x gembira di rumah sendiri. Ya mungkin kerana mereka buat keputusan besar tanpa bincang dengan aku terlebih dulu. Kecil hati dan terkilan. Juga ada unsur2 cemburu dengan ahli beit sendiri. Mereka sentiasa memerlukan dan diperlukan. Juga ada rahsia tentang mereka yang aku tidak tahu. Terasa bagaikan tiang lampu saja. Aku tiada banyak kisah menarik tentang sisters seantero dunia. Aku x punya ilmu agama yg banyak. Aku juga lambat menghafal Quran. Kadang2 aku rasa nak berhenti. Aku rasa kerdil and sometimes inferior too. Tapi adakah itu boleh aku jadikan alasan untuk tidak berjihad melawan nafsu untuk menunaikan tanggungjawab?! Sangat tidak valid alasan yg dikemuka. Rapuhnya imanmu, Farah.
Farah, ingat Allah kata..
"Diwajibkan ke atas kamu berperang, padahal itu tidak menyenangkan bagimu.
Tetapi boleh jadi kamu tidak mnyenangi sesuatu, pdahal itu baik bagimu,
dan boleh jadi kamu mnyukai ssuatu, pdahal itu tidak baik bagimu.
Allah mngetahui, sedang kamu tidak mngetahui"
Surah al-Baqarah:216
Farah, banyakkan berlapang dada. Selalu istighfar. Selalu memaafkan smua orang sebelum tidur. Hentikan su'uzhon. Banyakkan bertaubat. Tajdid niat selalu. Jangan fikir banyak untuk buat kebaikan, FASTABIKUL KHAIRAT, just do it, Farah!!!
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